Love in the Age of the Internet

I am a happily married woman. Having been off the dating scene for 31 years, I look at dating and the single life like a scientist looks through a microscope. It's fascinating to me.

I have a dear friend, who after years of single-ness, listed on one of the online dating sites. I completely understand and encourage this. We're basically both techno-geeks, so online just makes sense to me.

But I never realized how many online sites there are... eHarmony, match.com, chemistry.com, the list goes on and on. There are specialty sites for people looking for significant others that share ancestry or religion--yes, there is a catholicmatch.com.

So, that got me to thinking... if you believe that everyone has a perfect match, a destined or fated significant other, then will they find you?

If my friend lists on eHarmony, what are the cosmic chances that her perfect match is on match.com instead? Or are the sites busted up by the seriousness of the people who register? Will people interested in dating, but not marriage, list on chemistry.com instead of eHarmony? Are the sites catering to the INTENT of the daters?

Do folks that list on one site look for matches and if they don't find someone, go to another site? I find it interesting.

Dating is about putting yourself out there, taking a risk. Single people are the bravest among us. If you don't believe that, then start asking people about their worst dating experience ever. The stories will curl your hair or your toes.

To continue to look and try to find that special someone you can spend your life with is a quest. It's a commitment. People who strive for that kind of happiness are optimists.

I met an interesting couple at a party. They met on match.com. She was a lawyer, he was an engineer. Both highly educated and successful people. The indicated that they selected online dating because of a lack of time. They just didn't have time to hang around bars, wait on friends to fix them up, or engage in extra curricular activities to expose themselves to like minded people. Busy people rely on the technology to save themselves time and trouble.

Modern dating websites are the new matchmakers, the new intermediary. In the old days, your family would vet individuals before arranging a marriage. No one in the US expects their parents to find them a mate. Nowadays, singles have to vet their own prospects. Some of the websites actually do background investigations. People with criminal records or felony charges against them will be winnowed out by the service. For the current single, it's about streamlining their process. Finding like minded people who are acceptable by society's standards.

Love in the age of the internet is exciting, distinct and convenient. In these days and times, I think it's genius. I just wonder if it's possible for fate to intervene??

--Sandee Wagner