Timekeeping in the new millennium

The thirtieth wedding anniversary is traditionally the 'pearl' anniversary according to Hallmark cards and other folks who want to sell you stuff. When my DH and I were coming up on that milestone a couple years ago, I became fixated on getting something pearl to celebrate thirty years of marital bliss and/or acceptance.

After scanning the jewelers and realizing that I already owned a string of very nice pearls, I saw watches with pearl faces and said, "that's it!" Then I drug my darling husband through jewelry store after jewelry store looking for matching watches with pearl faces.

What you probably already know, but I didn't know at the time, is that you can find a LOT of female watches with pearl faces, but it's a little more rare to find the man's watch set up the same.

We eventually found a set of matching wrist watches with mother of pearl faces and the bonus? Self winding. I was in alt! Never to buy a battery again! And it had the date and day of the week in a tiny window. Very swank. Very shiny.

It took no more than a couple months to realize my problem. My watch was always fast. At least 15 minutes fast after being reset within the past 48 hours. A nice watch purchased from a fine jewelry store does have a warranty. When I took it back, they assured me that this was not totally unusual and sent it back to the manufacturer for an adjustment.

That cut the advancing rate of time in about half.

I've been wearing this self winding watch for a couple of years now. Whenever someone asks me the time of day, I say, "somewhere around XX:XX but I'm usually fast". I look at my wrist and realize I'll make any appointment. I end up resetting this watch once or twice a week to keep the space time continuum from collapsing around me.

When I got up this morning, I realized it's more than forty minutes fast today. That's a significant chunk of time. Time to reset the little darling again. I'm beginning to wonder if it's me. Am I so spastic that the internal mechanism is just winding and winding it's little clockwork heart out?

I was so taken with this watch when I purchased it. It symbolized the great love of my life and it was truly the finest timekeeping device I've ever owned (if you don't count the Movado that fell off a truck that my BIL gave me). I was charmed by it. It made me smile when it caught my eye.

Now, I strain to see the tiny date in the tiny window. Half the time when I reset the watch, I screw up the date and the day of the week shows in Japanese or something foreign. Then it's really hard to get back in English.

Why is it that by the time I could afford a nice timepiece, my eyes were shot and I can't really see it well?

Most kids don't wear watches anymore. They have cell phones and when you ask them the time, they whip out their phone and give you the EXACT time. Synchronized by satellite. Timekeeping in the new millennium is simple that way. Being spastic doesn't affect it.

--Sandee Wagner