Chunking Things

Friday, April 16, 2010

Beauty and Its Iterations

My family is full of pale skinned redheads.  It really came as no surprise to me that my sons gravitated toward blonds and brunettes.  My theory is that a man is attracted to women that are unlike his family group.  I'm pretty sure that's something that's hardwired in to keep us from interbreeding.

It never surprised me when my son waxed poetic about brunettes, but it always made me cringe when he started in on those with highlights.  When the craze for big stripes of hair color ascended in the fashion world, my son was graduated from college, and dating looking for a mate.  He referred to women with those big stripes of highlights as 'self loathing brunettes'.  And he mainly avoided dating them.

I've always thought of hair as such a transient feature.  If you want to dye it pink, do it.  You can cut it off at the roots and it will grow back.  If you have chemo and loose it all, it might grow back curly.  I would generally try anything with my hair because it grows so fast that even if I don't like the outcome, in two weeks it will be different.

Most of the hair color I know comes about when women are trying to camouflage gray. We do all kinds of high lighting and low lighting and rinses to try and hide the gray hairs that begin to sprinkle in.  While I was working full time, I colored my hair every two months, like clockwork.  When I landed out of the job market for a while, I decided I couldn't keep up with the expense, so I stopped.  The gray hair that's coming in on my head is not only gray, it's curly.  More kink and curl than I've ever had in my life.  All of a sudden, my hair has body and wave.  Uncanny.  When I colored my hair, it was an attempt to even the playing field in a job market filled with youngsters.  I think there is a lot of ageism in the workplace.

My son, on the other hand, takes hair coloring as some kind of self judgment.  If a girl does something that drastic with her hair, then she's really not comfortable in her own skin.  To a certain extent, I believe that might be true.  When I see a little Asian girl wearing blue contacts and dying her hair blond, I often wonder who she's fooling?  But when a brunette just puts in highlights?  Self loathing?  I don't think so.

The wide stripes of color that have thankfully been replaced with a different hair trend only made one thing happen in my brain.  Whenever I saw someone with wide stripes of color on their hair, light dark or in between, the circus theme music started playing in my mind.  It always seemed like circus stripes to me.

My son went on to marry a darling brunette.  She doesn't fuss much with her hair and is very natural.  He loves her truly and I think they were made for each other.  I just hope she never decides she wants a change and comes home with highlights.

--Sandee Wagner

6 comments:

Marilyn said...

My hair stylists over the years have always said they love having me as a customer because I'll let them do anything. And that's because, like you, I think it's only hair. It'll grow back. Even the time it turned mallard-green. Or the time it broke off because the stylist overprocessed a perm. It always comes back.

I'm not ready to be gray yet, though, so I'll continue to color every 4-5 weeks. (How could you make it two months?? My roots . . . ack!)

Zack and Kimmee said...

LOL... I read the post trying desperately to figure out WHICH son you were talking about... REALLY! So - I chopped my hair off and got highlights, to which Z said, "if you paid for highlights, you got ripped off!" I explained in detail how I didn't want it to look like I have highlights and I sure don't want to go back frequently because I can't afford it! At any rate, he dated me as a blonde, married me as a brunette, and loves me no matter what! Good POST!

Emmylee said...

Craig keeps looking at me funny since I cut my hair... He keeps telling me that he really likes it, but that it's soooo different! And it is, I kept shaking my head back and forth at work today because my hair MOVES and I can FEEL it!!

Unknown said...

Marilyn,

I had the gal use non-permanent color and weave it through like highlights. It kept the color raked through my hair naturally and eventually the gray got colored. Never had to sweat roots. I'm that lazy.

Unknown said...

Kimmee,

When Zack pursued you, he was the one willing to do anything to his hair. You always look fabulous, but I have to admit, I like you much better as a brunette than a bleach blond. He does love you. A momma can tell.

Unknown said...

Emm,

I'm so proud that you cut it and donated it to Locks of Love. It will grow right back, faster than you realize. Craig does not embrace change. I think we all know that by now.